Sunday Diaries

 

It's been a week. I mean, I guess the same could be said for all of 2020?

I've found taking walks to be a critical part of my self care during these last few months. On days when I feel anxious or sad or distressed, I've found getting out of the house to be a boost to my mood. I have a few different routes and a couple of destinations that feel safe. There have definitely been days where my walks have gone on for longer than I anticipated and I've received texts or calls from Paul to ensure I'm alright.

On Wednesday I took one of these walks and listened to this podcast. This episode of Lessons Learned with Komal was all about learning to celebrate your wins, no matter how big or small. And learning to celebrate the wins along the way (and not just after you reach the goal / the things happens / the milestone is accomplished). I found myself listening and nodding enthusiastically and by the end tears were streaming down my face because it was the message I needed to hear.

Celebrating my wins isn't something I excel at. And when I do manage to celebrate them, I'm not great at basking in the glory of that win - I can often be on to the next thing, or find a way to criticize or downplay myself. I'm so proud of the life I've built and things that I've accomplished/done along the way, but for some reason celebrating that often feels difficult. I think some of this comes from a mentality of "this is just what you do" which is something that I've felt for as long as I can remember. Sometimes I'll downright downplay things that have happened, the work I've done or what I've accomplished. Even now I wanted to put accomplished in quotation marks - this stuff runs deep. I'm working on it. 

In the podcast, Komal encouraged listeners to journal their wins, both throughout the process and at the end. I took this message to heart and went home after my walk and made a list of things that I could celebrate from the last few months. 2020 doesn't feel much like a year worth celebrating, but upon reflection I've had some wins along the way. I'm trying to give those wins some space and hold onto the good feelings that come alongside them. As I said, this podcast was the thing I needed to hear this week and I'm thankful that the message came through loud and clear at the perfect moment. 

As I write this, I'm celebrating the small win of celebrating my wins. A bit meta, but it's a big thing for me. I'd love to hear about your wins. Know I'm always here to celebrate with you!

image via @lessonslearned.co Instagram